Jeffy's Babie Cutie

I found these on a friends xanga site and I just had to have them

Fri, 04 May 2007 17:52:08 GMT

The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen nor
touched. They must be felt with the heart.

The world is a better place when you smile.

Missing someone is a part of loving them.
If you're never apart, then you'll never know
how strong your love really is.

Love isn't a decision, it's a feeling.
If we could decide who we would love,
it would be much simpler, but less magical.
Love isn't something that can be
easily replaced or easily found.
So when you love someone
never let that person go because
when they're gone, you miss them the most.

Being without you takes a lot of getting used to.
I should learn to live with it, but I don't want to.

You don't love someone because they're perfect.
You love someone in spite of the fact they're not.

He's the one i'm scared to lose. The one I can't walk away from.
He's the one my heart melts to. The one that shines in my heart.
He's the one I love, cherish and adore. The one that..
I can't live without.

Life is about change. Sometimes it's painful,
sometimes it's beautiful, but most of the time it's both

I wasn't sure that this day would
ever come, but you were. I wasn't sure love could survive
everything we put it through, but you were.
You were always strong and always sure. And now I know
I want you to stand beside me for the rest of my life.
That's what i'm sure of.

I think im afraid to be happy because whenever
you get too happy, something bad always happens.

I guess its gonna have to hurt, I guess im gonna have to cry, and let go of some things.

Missing you isn't the hardest part;
its knowing I once had you,
is what breaks my heart

Obstacles are put in your way to see
If what you want is worth fighting for

The worst thing you can do for love is to deny it.
So when you find that special someone, don't let anyone
or anything stand in your way.

On my knees, I'll ask,
Last chance for one last dance.
Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand

I can't help believing
That it's worth it somehow
Cause I've worked too damn hard
To wanna give up now

One day you're going to wake up and realize how much you care about her, and when that day comes she'll be waking up next to the guy who already knew.

You know your in love when nobody
else is even worth looking at

Keep Smiling..
&& when it starts to rain on your parade;
break out the [ slip && slide ]

To fear love is to fear life, and those who
fear life are already three parts dead

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much

Everyone makes mistakes.. the trick is to
making them when nobody is looking

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot
be seen or even touched.. they must be felt with the heart

The thing I want most is to fall back,
close my eyes, and forget anything ever happened..

She's gonna be ok, or so every one thinks
but beneath the smile and plastered face she
is about to break, only to find out nobody cares

Just because someone doesn't love you
in the way you want them to,
doesn't mean that they don't love you
with all they've got.

Be someone that others can lean on in
times of need or sorrow.

I know I should move on
so I don't get hurt anymore.
But it's so hard to let you go

The day you finally realize,
who you should be with;
might be the day she says,
"You're Too Late"

It's the way he makes me laugh
even when I don't want to smile.

Everytime the phone rings I hope that
when I pick up i'll hear his voice
;;one last time

Show Me The Way To Your Heart

I want to be able to look at you
&& not remember how bad you hurt me.

I walk past you
but I don't even know who you are
anymore

Sometimes you have to let go
Just to see if there is anything worth
holding onto.

Sometimes it doesn't matter how long it is you've waited.
It's just the person you're waiting for

Fate determines who walks in your life but YOU decide who you let walk out - who you let stay - & who you refuse to let get away

Hope for the best... prepare for the worst... life's not a movie... it's all unrehearsed

Sometimes I`ll look at you & wonder if you ever look at me.
Sometimes I`ll think of you & wonder if you ever think of me.

You think your days are ordinary
and no one ever thinks about you
but we're all the same
and [she can hardly breathe without you]

If you only knew the way I feel
I'd really love to tell you

You will NEVER know how many times
I`ve laid in my bed ALL night just thinking
about how MUCH you meant to me &&
how much I LOVE you. <3

Don't look for the hottest guy or the most popular jock
in class. Look for the guy that makes you feel like you're
actually worth a second glance. The one that makes you
happy to be the person you don't have to try to be or want to be. The guy who isn't like all the rest.. but completely different. Yet it's why you like him.. because he isn't like any guy you've ever known ; HE'S JUST HiM

To every girl who gossiped about me in corners of parties, to those who were my slap in the face, to the close minded or misunderstanding, to those boys that broke my heart, and to those friends who turned out to be back stabbers. you all challenged me to become the person I wanted to be. I am stronger because of all the stupid things you put me through. no matter how much you have done to me, you have unknowingly done so much more for me. so, thanks.

Never think you're nothing. Never cry at night over not being pretty enough. Never tell yourself you'll never be good enough. Because to someone, you're everything,

Open your eyes Silly
I'm crazy about you

&& smile like you mean it, laugh like you never have before, love everyone to the fullest of your ability;;; because He put us on this world to live not to shy away from the only real things that matter

At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines... that are way too dangerous to cross

All I wanted to do today was
collapse in someones arms..
& cry, but there wasn't anyone
there to catch me

It's like you want him..
well you don't want to be with him
you just miss what you had
in the beginning

You had me.
for the millionth time.
You had me.
I know I said I would never come back
I said I'd never do this again.
but here I am again,
laying on your bed.
And I can't remember
a thing I've ever said.

Sometimes it takes pain to make you
smarter,and once u think the storm
stops, it only starts to rain harder*

The fear of romance
The pain of living
The joy of sorrow
The strength of forgiving

Throughout life you will meet one person who
is unlike any other. This person is the one you
could forever talk to. They understand you in a
way that no one else does or ever could. This
person is your soul mate and best friend.

You don't realize how strong a person is
until you see them at their weakest moment

I wanted a perfect ending but now
I've learned the hard way that
some poems don't rhyme and some
stories don't have a clear beginning
and a happy ending, life is about
not knowing, taking the moment
and making the best of it without
knowing what will happen next <3

Same old story
Everybody knows
One heart holding on
& One letting go

Sometimes you just gotta be weird.
Go against the crowd and act stupid.
Laugh till you cry and
cry till you can't feel the pain.
Don't listen to what other people say.
You know you're being yourself
and that's all that counts.
Don't worry what they will think about you.
Your true friends will stay by you.
So just be yourself.

Life is just too short to wake up in
the morning with regrets, so love the
people that treat you right & forget
about the ones that don't. No one
said it would be easy just that it
will be worth it in the end.

Burnt out, wasted, empty, & hollow
Today's just yesterday's tomorrow
The sun died out, the ashes sifted
I'm still here, warped & twisted

All the good times we had together,
All the laughs we shared went to waste.
I hate you.

So put your hand in mine, never let go,
Never wake up cause Im done with promises.
Im taking blood oaths. Feels like you could kiss
My imperfections, my imperfections away.
& I would stand, stand by your side
Until the sun turns the sky,
All the colors I see in your eyes.
And Ill never need to see the sun again,
Theres enough light in your eyes to light up our little world.
So take me, take me away.
Kill me slowly, I'll never be the same.
And I swear to you, on everything I am,
& I dedicate to you all that I have
And I promise you that Ill stand right by your side
Forever and always until the day I die

I'm on my feet
I'm on the floor
I'm good to go
All I need is just to hear a song I know
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine
I wanna fall in love tonight

Yeah I'm good but I'M no angel.
I do sins but I'm not a devil
I'm just a small girl in a big world
trying to find somebody to love <3

As I sit and stare into space
memories of us flash into my
mind like a film strip on replay

You're in every song
that I hear these days.

And I'll play you songs to make you fall in love with me.
Too late. I already adore you.

There's this girl.
Yeah, she's totally in love with this guy.
She'd go to the highest extremes,
just to see him smile.

I was blind and foolish
but I was just a girl.
So kiss me with your lies
and promise me the world.

She's not like that now. She knows better.
She knows now that people lie & promises
can be broken as quick as they're made.
She understands she might never be loved.

Cracks in the concrete
are just reminders that you fall apart
no matter how strong you are

Every moment I spend with you
is just another dream come true.

Let's run away. Name a place where the air tastes like rain and the sun shines like Sunday morning. You'll bring your laughter and I'll bring my sense of humor. We can waste the days, one week after another. Turn the music up and fall in love with me.

I know that when you kiss me,
it's not because you just want to kiss me...
it's because the joining of our lips says so
much more than we can ever put into words.

Dont dwell on those
from your past..
theres a reason
they didnt make it
to your future.

Butterflies got the best of me
my hands are shaking, my knees are weak
yeah, its like this every time before I'm about to see you

Everyone has that little spot inside of them
that just wishes they could just let loose
& show everyone who they truly are

I miss you more than I should,
and more than I thought I could.
I can't get my mind off you.

Or maybe I was only kidding myself
when I said that I didn't need you.
You mean more to me than I thought.
&& This is exactly what I didn't want to happen

& I cant picture you kissing her..cause for the longest time..I was the only one you were with.. Now that your gone I cant see you loving anyone..the way you loved me..Will you tell her what you told me..that I was the only one for you & you never wanted me to leave? cause pretty soon you'll leave her too..she'll be broken, shattered & torn the way I am. I'll never love anyone the way I loved you..cause I devoted everything to you. Including my heart

Every night, I say to
myself, "don't mess this
up.. hes what I need."

Trust me on this one..
I know how it feels
When you love someone for so long
that you just want to give up.
But dont cause everything may turn around
when you least expect it

I've been a lot of things
but never yours

Have you ever just sat in the dark,
blasted music and thought about the lyrics?
Well I have and every song that comes on,
I always find some way to relate it to you.

If you're callin' `bout my heart
It's still yours

Thu, 03 May 2007 21:07:46 GMT

For all who didnt know who I was talking about. This is my Emme Leu.
I miss her so much.
7.29.06-4.26.06

Fucking Die

Thu, 03 May 2007 01:43:30 GMT

I am so fucking tired of people talking shit!
Dont sit there and call me a bitch just cause you dont like me.
I dont fucking like you but I dont talk shit about you.
I fucking hate you.
I hate the way you treated her.
But I kept my mouth shut!
So do us all the favor and keep your mouth shut.
No one wants to hear about your shit.
You are fucking her and fucking every other girl all at the same time.
You give her something and I am coming back to your ass.
You will die and get castrated bitch.
Now I am not afraid to say what I want to say about you cause you deserve it.
Talk shit all you want but I would watch it...
Cause about 100 people already want you dead.
And yes I know you read my livejournal cause you go through hers to see it.

Sat, 28 Apr 2007 23:19:49 GMT

I'm taking baby steps.
Still in complete and utter shock.
Its so sad to lift the garage door open and not have anyone there to greet us.
I almost cried when arriving back to the house last night.

We had gone to the gonderman's for a while.
We ended up eating there.
We ordered Straw Hat.
3 large pizzas. (Pepperoni, half cheese half cheese and sausage, and combo)
And 2 orders of bacon bread twisties.
For the first time in two days we all actually laughed.
Even at the site of seeing my dog arrive with my dad,
Everyone was all excited to see him.

Well tonight is race night.
Jeff is racing.
Even though he isnt 100%,
He is still going to try and give it his all.
Dan is also racing so they will all be there too.
Robby will be in the Pits because Randy went home sick.
So he isnt coming.

Fri, 27 Apr 2007 18:29:44 GMT

well,
we lost her.
we lost Emme Leu.
i am so upset.
everyone here is completely a wreck.
Not really in the mood to talk!

R.I.P.
Emme Leu
7.29.06-4.26.07

Thu, 26 Apr 2007 19:29:58 GMT

well i have had an eventful past 24 hours.
Yesterday after work I got to Jeff's house.
Then we realized that he needed to go to the Emergency room.
We were there for hours.
Then i brought him home and then I went home to bed.
Then I get to his house this morning and Emme Leu was convulsing and foaming at the mouth.
So I had to rush her down to the vet.
She had eaten Snail bait, wood, pieces of golf ball, fertalizer, tags from clothes.
So she is still there now.
all we have to do it wait!

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 19:01:16 GMT

So an addition to my post yesterday
Jeff and I had another fight.
Well I think we did.
It was kinda weird.
We went hot tubing and things were great.
Then all of a sudden he didnt want to hold me.
Turned his back to me and didnt speak a word for about 20 minutes.
So then I just sat there not saying anything cause I didnt want to piss him off.
Then he came over to me and was like "Baby wants wrong?"
See why I am confused!
Guys are just confusing.
But thats ok.

So I have to work today.
2-6pm.
Then I am supposed to go to Jeff's house to watch a movie.
His mom rented "Babel"
It looks good.
We watched "Blood Diamond"
It was really good.

Haha I am watching Punk'd right now.
Its super funny.
Zac Efron and Ashley Tisdale are on here.
He is freaking out!

So Jeff and my 9 month anniversary is on sunday.
We have no idea what we are going.
Probably nothing cause thats just what we do.
Anniversary's arent that big of a deal.
6 months was and probably our 1 year.
I have never done anything special on a 1 year anniversary.
I doubt he will plan anything special.
He always said that he wouldnt do anything big because last time he did the girl left him.
I dont know how many times I could tell him that I wouldnt do that to him,
But I dont think he believes me.
But thats ok.
With time I think it will sink in.

So yeah,
The drama is beginning to disappear.
Which is a good think.
I dont need that shit.

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 16:15:16 GMT

As I watch everyone's relationship falter around me,
It really makes me think.
"Will mine really last?"
It sucks to see all your friends hurting.
You dont know what to do or what to say.
I havent been in their position in a long time.
It sucks cause I want to feel their pain cause I love them to death.
But Jeff and I are together
And are going to be for a long while.

Mon, 23 Apr 2007 22:46:18 GMT

So as I have had a week to reflect on everything that has happened.
Its so scary to think that today might be your last day.
You wake up and head to classes,
Not knowing what awaits you.
I have seen a nation come together.
And its makes me cry.
We come together for 32 deaths on a college campus,
But that same day we had 200 soliders die.
I wish everyone would come together for that too.
I knew someone who was in the West Ambler Dorm.
I am so glad that he is alive.
Talking to him has made me see this whole thing in their point of view.
70% of these people had no idea what was going on.
How would I react to something like that?
Not knowing what was going on 5 minutes away from me.
Its crazy.
I went to the races on saturday and saw so many people with VT stuff on.
I didnt feel alone.
I had my homemade necklace and my T-shirt.
We all came together.
Its amazing.
From Hawaii to Maine to the Florida Keys,
Everyone wore Orange and Maroon on friday.
So many people have spirit!
For that I thank everyone who has helped us remember the 32 lives lost on that somber day.

We Will Prevail We Are Virginia Tech

Lets Go Hokies
(clap clap clap clap clap)
Lets Go Hokies
(clap clap clap clap clap)
Lets Go Hokies
(clap clap clap clap clap)

Sun, 22 Apr 2007 17:57:54 GMT

-VT

Sat, 21 Apr 2007 02:28:21 GMT

Well,
Today was my first day at my new job.
It was totally cool.
It couldnt have been anymore fun.
I was at work like 45 minutes early.
I thought I had to be there at 830.
Nope I wasnt supposed to be on until 900.
Thats fine though.
So then I had to go to Lodi.
Half way to Lodi my work called.
Told me I didnt need to go and that I could just go home.
So instead of going home,
I went to visit Jeff at work.
Had lunch with him, James, & Janet.
But one thing kinda caught my eye.
As we walked to pick up the pizza,
He wouldnt hold my hand.
He would hold my finger, but not my hand.
Maybe thats just me,
But lately he has been acting weird.
He has changed.
I couldnt tell you how cause I havent figured it out.
It kinda makes me sad though.
I will get over it.

Well I am currently watching the Red Sox vs. Yankees game.
All I can say is...
Lets Go Red Sox!
I love the A's but its all about the Red Sox at heart.
I love baseball.
Dude I cannot wait until May 18.
Its all about going to the A's vs. Giants game.
Zito is going down bitches.

I am still in a little bit of shock about Virginia Tech.
We had 3 people arrested yesterday.
They were planning on attacking some of the local colleges.
How dumb can people get.
How can you take someone's life like that.
What did they ever do to you.

Well we should be racing tomorrow.
If it doenst rain.
I hope it doesnt.
I miss the races.
Even though its only going on 2 weeks that I havent been there.
It was rained out last week.
Jeff is racing if we do race.

I so want to see "In The Land Of Women"
It looks like a good movie.
I dont think Jeff will see it with me though.
He probably thinks it looks dumb.
But I dont care!

Wed, 18 Apr 2007 19:49:20 GMT

Went to the A's Game last night.
They played the Angels.
And of course we won 4-1.
But we froze to death.
Jeff wanted to get there early to get good bleacher seats.
We arrived 45 minutes before will call opened.
2 1/2 hours before they even opened the gates.
Which means it was like 4 hours before game time.
Boy was I bored.
But we got our A's fleece blanket.
So I was happy.

And my friend and her boyfriend broke up.
What an ass.
You dont go to some other girls prom.
You dont take out the stuff from your girlfriends prom.
And you definatly dont replace it with the girl you went with Garder!
You asshole.
Just remember Karma is a bitch.
I had to go over there and pick her up off the floor cause you crushed her.

Sunday was my last day at The Gap.
My dad doesnt know though.
He thinks today is my last day.
But no need to worry.
I got the job at Sports Authority.
I go for my orientation today at 1:30pm.

Last week I was sitting in Jeff's room.
And he was playing with my ring that I always wear.
So he was messing around with it and he suddenly took my hand,
And put it on my ring finger.
It gave me chills.
I cannot wait until that actually happens.
I will probably cry and be all happy.
And of course I will say yes.

I have had so many friends that I havent seen since the end of the season last year.
And the first thing they say to me is "You guys getting married yet?"
I love it!

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 18:54:08 GMT

I am still in complete & Utter shock about yesterday.
I dont see how someone could kill 32 people and then himself.
Its scary.
It just makes you think that this could happen anywhere.
Even in an top ranked school.
I got to watch the video the student took from his phone.
It was appauling.
I cannot believe someone could do this.
I am still trying to think if I know anyone that went there.
All day yesterday I was glued to MSMBC new coverage about it.
I want to know everything about it.
See and people wonder why I want to be a journalist!

Gunman Kills 32 In Virginia Tech Rampage

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 00:15:41 GMT

A gunman massacred 32 people at Virginia Tech in the deadliest shooting rampage in modern U.S. history Monday, cutting down his victims in two attacks two hours and a half-mile apart before the university could figure out what was going on and get the warning out to students.

The bloodbath ended with the gunman committing suicide, bringing the death toll to 33 and stamping the campus in the picturesque Blue Ridge Mountains with tragedy, perhaps forever.

"I'm really at a loss for words to explain or understand the carnage that has visited our campus," Virginia Tech President Charles Steger said.

He was also faced with difficult questions about the university's handling of the emergency and whether it did enough to warn students and protect them after the first burst of gunfire.

Investigators offered no motive for the attack. The gunman's name was not immediately released, and it was not known if he was a student.

Wielding two pistols, the gunman opened fire about 7:15 a.m. at West Ambler Johnston, a coed dormitory, then stormed Norris Hall, a classroom building on the other side of the 2,600-acre campus, chaining the doors behind him to keep anyone from escaping.

Two people died in a dorm room, and 31 others were killed in Norris Hall, including the gunman, who put a bullet in his head. At least 26 people were hurt, some seriously.

Students jumped from windows in panic. Young people and faculty members carried out some of the wounded themselves, without waiting for ambulances to arrive. Many found themselves trapped behind the chained and padlocked doors. SWAT team members with helmets, flak jackets and assault rifles swarmed over the campus. A student used his cell-phone camera to record the sound of bullets echoing through a stone building.

Trey Perkins, who was sitting in a German class in Norris Hall, told The Washington Post that the gunman barged into the room at about 9:50 a.m. and opened fire for about a minute and a half, squeezing off 30 shots in all.

The gunman, Perkins said, first shot the professor in the head and then fired on the students. Perkins said the gunman was about 19 years old and had a "very serious but very calm look on his face."

"Everyone hit the floor at that moment," said Perkins, 20, of Yorktown, Va., a sophomore studying mechanical engineering. "And the shots seemed like it lasted forever."

Students bitterly complained that there were no public-address announcements on campus after the first shots. Many said the first word from the university was an e-mail more than two hours into the rampage — around the time the gunman struck again.

"I think the university has blood on their hands because of their lack of action after the first incident," said Billy Bason, 18, who lives on the seventh floor of the dorm.

"If you had apprehended a suspect, I could understand having classes even after two of your students have perished. But when you don't have a suspect in a college environment and to put the students in a situation where they're congregated in large numbers in open buildings, that's unacceptable to me."

Steger defended the university's handling of the tragedy, saying authorities believed that the shooting at the dorm was a domestic dispute and mistakenly thought the gunman had fled the campus.

"We had no reason to suspect any other incident was going to occur," he said.

Steger emphasized that the university closed off the dorm after the first attack and decided to rely on e-mail and other electronic means to notify members of the university, but with 11,000 people driving onto campus first thing in the morning, it was difficult to get the word out. He said that before the e-mail went out, the university began telephoning resident advisers in the dorms to notify them and sent people to knock on doors to spread the word. Students were warned to stay inside and away from the windows.

"We can only make decisions based on the information you had at the time. You don't have hours to reflect on it," Steger said. He called the massacre a tragedy of "monumental proportions."

A law enforcement official, speaking on condition of anonymity because the investigation was incomplete, said that the gunman had two pistols and multiple clips of ammunition.

Some students and Laura Wedin, a student programs manager at Virginia Tech, said the first notification they got of the shootings came in an e-mail at 9:26 a.m., more than two hours after the first shooting.

The e-mail had few details. It read: "A shooting incident occurred at West Amber Johnston earlier this morning. Police are on the scene and are investigating." The message warned students to be cautious and contact police about anything suspicious.

Everett Good, junior, said of the lack of warning: "Someone's head is definitely going to roll over that."

Edmund Henneke, associate dean of engineering, said he was in the classroom building and he and colleagues had just read the e-mail advisory regarding the first shooting and were discussing it when he heard gunfire. He said moments later SWAT team members rushed them downstairs, but the doors were chained and padlocked from the inside. They left the building through a construction area that had not been locked.

Until Monday, the deadliest mass shooting in modern U.S. history was in Killeen, Texas, in 1991, when George Hennard plowed his pickup truck into a Luby's Cafeteria and shot 23 people to death, then himself.

The massacre Monday took place almost eight years to the day after the Columbine High bloodbath near Littleton, Colo. On April 20, 1999, two teenagers killed 12 fellow students and a teacher before taking their own lives.

Previously, the deadliest campus shooting in U.S. history was a rampage that took place in 1966 at the University of Texas at Austin, where Charles Whitman climbed the clock tower and opened fire with a rifle from the 28th-floor observation deck. He killed 16 people before he was shot to death by police.

Founded in 1872, Virginia Tech is nestled in southwestern Virginia, about 160 miles west of Richmond. With more than 25,000 full-time students, it has the state's largest full-time student population. The school is best known for its engineering school and its powerhouse Hokies football team.

The rampage took place on a brisk spring day, with snow flurries swirling around the campus. The campus is centered around the Drill Field, a grassy field where military cadets — who now represent a fraction of the student body — practice. The dorm and the classroom building are on opposites sides of the Drill Field.

A White House spokesman said
President Bush was horrified by the rampage and offered his prayers to the victims and the people of Virginia. "The president believes that there is a right for people to bear arms, but that all laws must be followed," spokeswoman Dana Perino said

After the shootings, all entrances to the campus were closed, and classes were canceled through Tuesday. The university set up a meeting place for families to reunite with their children. It also made counselors available and planned an assembly for Tuesday at the basketball arena.

It was second time in less than a year that the campus was closed because of a shooting.

Last August, the opening day of classes was canceled and the campus closed when an escaped jail inmate allegedly killed a hospital guard off campus and fled to the Tech area. A sheriff's deputy involved in the manhunt was killed on a trail just off campus. The accused gunman, William Morva, faces capital murder charges.

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 17:43:18 GMT

Well...
We all know that racing season has started but yesterday it rained all day.
So guess what...
No races.

Boy does that suck.
So Jeff and I went to the movies instead.

So I have to work today but I think it might be my last day.
I am supposed to get a call from Sports Authority.
I am going to call them tomorrow if they dont call me.
I want out of The Gap so bad.
That places Royaly sucks.
I know I shouldnt say that after only working there for like 2 weeks
But ahhhh I hate those people.

Things have been good lately.
Nothing bad has really happened.

Lake Amador 07

Fri, 13 Apr 2007 18:45:49 GMT

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 21:08:06 GMT

A long update is needed!
But not right now.
To tired.
And more pictures to be posted
of Lake Amador over the weekend!

Wed, 04 Apr 2007 17:37:03 GMT

Last night I hung out with Jeff.
All day I had been sending him pictures of me.
Not decent ones, but naughty ones.
I wont get into detail.
They were just fucking gross.
But I was being gross.
But he loved every minute of it.
Well as soon as I walk into his house,
He began to undress me in his kitchen.
Well we moved to his bedroom where he began to do the unimaginable to me.
It was amazing.
I wanted to do him right then and there.
But then his mom came hom.
It wasnt like we havent done it when people were home,
But the mood that I was in.. I would of been loud.
So we ended up going to Longs, The UPS store, and Walmart.
Then when we got back to his house he jumped into the shower.
We were supposed to have dinner at Billweiser's house.
Well over there him and his dad were playing pool,
and his mom was playing the slots.
Oh and you cant forget about the pinball machine.
Then dinner came.
Spaghetti, bread, salad, and ice cream.
It was really good.
Then I got on the slots for a while.
We left there about 10:00.
I didnt stay at Jeff's long.
I wanted to get home and get some sleep.

Well I have to work on Thursday morning from 6-10.
I am just doing stock.
Then leaving before the store opens.
BEAUTIFUL!

Jeff leaves friday for his annual Easter weekend.
He wont be back until Monday.
But I wont get to see him until Tuesday.
I have to work on Monday 5:15-10pm.

Sports Authority called me today.
I filled out that application about a month ago.
They wanted to schedule me for an interview.
I wish they would of called me before Gap did.
Its closer to home and it has to do with sports.
But the pay is better at The Gap.
Oh well...
Things always work out the way they do for a reason.

Jeff is now known as my Honey-Bear.
It fits him good.
I dont think he has a nick-name for me yet.
But who knows.
I love that boy with all my heart.
Til the day I die.
He really is my soul mate.
I havent had these feelings towards anyone ever.
Its kinda scary.
But with him, I feel no need to hide who i really am.
Like he knows that I love sex.
All the Foreplay.. everything.
Know one else knew that.

I cannot wait til Jeff and I get a place together.
Then I dont ever have to leave him at night.
I can just cuddle up next to him and fall asleep.

Tue, 03 Apr 2007 18:30:28 GMT

Yesterday was hella fun.
I went to my orientation at The Gap Kids & Babys.
The other people they had choosen was Ammie and Nikko.
They are awesome.
I know we are all going to become realyl good friends.
I have to work on Thursday 6-10am.
I am only doing stock and I'm out before the store opens.
Which is cool cause then I can go home and sleep for a while.
Before Jeff gets off and then I will be well rested.

Jeff leaves on Friday for Don Pedro.
He will be gone til Monday.
I wont see him until Tuesday because I work on Monday 5:15-10pm.
But I guess I will live.
I cannot wait to hold him in my arms again.
I love him alot.
I love him more than words can say.

I will not be going to the races on Saturday.
No thanks.
I dont want to watch the damn 410s and the dwarf cars.
Fuck that shit!

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 22:09:30 GMT

OMG This weekend was so much fun.
Jeff raced.
He made the most amazing pass in his heat race.
It made me have a heart attack
But everyone loved it.
They gave him a standing ovation!
It was amazing.
But he lead about 10 laps in the main.
Finished second.
Still did a great job.
Everyone was there cheering for him
He has gained alot more fans this year.
Thats really good.

Here are some pictures From This weekend...

Miss Aly-gator and I hanging out before Jeff came out for his main!

Its Da Crew!

Throwin it up Racing Style. Go 14!

Tyler and Robby trying to be all cool cheerin for Jeff!

Miss Aly-Gator and I in front of Jeff's Car.

Jeff after the races!

My baby and his sexy racecar!

Now its my turn to have my way with the racecar!

Sat, 31 Mar 2007 01:49:06 GMT

Today just really couldnt get any better.
I finally got a job.
At The Kids Gap.
Woot I'm super excited!
No one can ruin my mood!

Thu, 29 Mar 2007 20:37:58 GMT

Well today is mine and my baby's 8 Month anniversary.
I can really say I am happy that I spent 8 months of my life with him.
There are many many more years to come.
I love him to death.
"He's The Only Thing That Keeps Me Wishing On A Wishing Star"
Here are some pictures from the past 8 months...

Wed, 28 Mar 2007 21:00:43 GMT

I love how in a matter of days,
Everything changes.

Dude people are full of fucking drama.
I'm not saying I dont have any,
Cause I know I have my Share of drama.
But for someone who talks so much shit about someone,
And when it comes down to the wire,
Forgets about everyone who was there when he treated her like shit.

Yeah sounds dumb doesnt it?
I think so.
Ok so I have this friend.
Who is dating some asshole
But I deal with him cause I want her to be happy.
I told her from the beginning that if she ever needed to talk,
I would only be a phone call away.
Well her little boyfriend got all butthurt.
He was all pissed off at her for telling me things about their relationship.
Obviously he doesnt know what a friend is there for.
But anywho...
He called her a liar and he cant trust her and that she acts like her mom.
Well I was there to comfort her when he told her he needed a break.
Not once but TWICE.
So she sat there and was all upset.
Didnt know what to do.
But again she took him back.

Round... I lost count.
So after everyone telling her that she can do better
She began to act strange.
Her boyfriend and a guy friend of hers got into a big fight about her.
Her guy friend only wanted what was best for her.
They would always text each other cause he was concerned for her safety.
Of course like any boyfriend would, took that as a threat.

So as their argument went on, She began getting upset at her boyfriend.
Yelled at him for taking her phone and reading all her stuff.
He called her a liar again and told her that is what she will always do is LIE!

So she wanted to talk again and wanted to call her guy friend
To tell him how sorry she was for her boyfriends actions.
He told her not to worry about it.

Everyone was all fine and dandy til I woke up to an alarming text this morning.
It was from her guy friend.
Telling me that she had text him telling him not to text her anymore.
For his safety and for her to have no more drama.
(We all know who sent that one... and it wasnt her)
So just for curiosity I text her asking her what was going on.
I get a text saying that she cant talk to me either.
I was like FUCK THIS!
I went off.
I told her to take Me, Her guy friend, and Jeff off her myspace
We dont want to deal with her shit.
Fuck her.

so if you read this... I am DONE!!!!
Dont need your drama.
And when he breaks your heart,
Cause you know he will
You will have no one cause you lost them all to your boyfriend
The one who brainwashes you.
Has you whipped.
Only wants you for one thing and you cant even see it.

Why do you think he wants an open relationship?
Why is he taking someone else to his senior and not his own girlfriend?
Yeah I wonder....

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 22:37:50 GMT

This weekend was so much better than the last.
I decided that Saturday night I wasn't going to go into the pits.
I was to sit in the stands with my grandma and Matthew.
We had tons of fun.
But the fun was barely started when everyone else showed up.
Aly.
Brendan.
Andrea.
Abby.
Joey.
Tyler.
Katie.
Chelsey.
Robby.
Jason.
Willie.
Brad.
James.
Anthony.
We had some much fun.
Jeff raced of course.
Thats why all of us were there.
Lol.
So the night wore on and the fun continued.
The sprints came our for their main.
I was super excited and nervous.
I swear I had like 3 panic attacks.
But all in all Jeff finished 6th.
Our of 19 thats not bad at all.

My babie beautiful car during hot laps before it got dirty.

Mizz Abigail Grace and I hanging out.
This girl is my angel.

Mizz Andrea Lynn and I.
After everything we have been through,
We still came out in the end as friends.

My two favorite girls and I hanging out watching their dad and Jeff race.

He's Qulifying.
He ended up qualifying like 6th I believe.
Ha and he finished 6th.

After his heat race.
Going to the pits to fix the car.
It was kinda broken.
But they made it all better.

I didnt get any pictures of the main event.
His camera when you set it to night pictures doesnt have auto focus.
So they came out hella blurry.
You had to of been there to see how much went on.
Jeff missed like 2 crashes in the first 5 laps.
Then on lap 14 he spun out.
Started in the back of the pack(19th)
Then came up through the field to finish 6th.
Sprints race next weekend.
So I will be there screaming my head off.

Mon, 19 Mar 2007 20:06:44 GMT

Dude saturday was fucking horrible.
Ok so we get to the track.
We buy our tickets and we are walking to the gate.
We get there and security guard pulled me aside.
He told me that becuase we have a pending lawsuit against the company,
I wasnt aloud in the track.
WHAT THE FUCK??
That didnt fly to well with anyone.
Well my grandma started yelling at him.
It was hella funny.
Well Then Donna(The track owner) came over.
And she got in it.
Well finally a decision came threw.
I was aloud in as long as I dont go on the fence.
I'm on the fence once and we are all out of here.
That would of meant Jeff couldnt race this year.
I kept to myself.

Well as the night went on we all kinda joked about it.
Well as we were watching the races all the Perry fans showed up.
As they acted as like nothing had happened last year.
They were all over it.
Came up and said hi to Jeff and I.
WEIRD.
Well the whole night they had security guard watching my every move.
I fucking hate that.
Well Jeff races next week.
So I should be in a good mood.
As long as no more drama goes down.

Ok yesterday was my grandma's 75 birthday.
We had a party at my uncle's house.
The whole family was there.
It was nice at first.
But as the night went on, I got in trouble for everything.
I was like get me the fuck out of here.
So Jeff and I left and went back to his house for a while.
The night ended with my passing the fuck out at my house.
I was so tired.

So today I have been cleaning like nobody's business.
I dont know why though.
I just want to clean.